Step 1: Watch the forecast- You've got to know when the big storms are coming to lay some ground work. The day before, you should start coughing uncontrollably at work. Maybe at the water cooler ask some people if they've heard about that nasty flu that your Wife/Husband/Kids have. Go on and on about how terrible it is then cough without covering your mouth.
Step 2: Making the call- Practice ahead of time so you've got that really sick and nasty sound. If you sound sick your boss is sure to be relieved that you're staying home and keeping that sickness out of the office.
Step 3: Safe Travels- Be careful. Nothing is going to blow your cover like a totaled car or horrific car accident. Be sure to have plenty of gas, inflate your tires and drive the speed : Sunscreen- This is no joke, apply sunscreen. Lots of sunscreen. Then apply more. Your boss expects you to be in bed all day. How are you going to explain a goggle tan?
Step 5: Leave Your Phone in the Car: Seriously, don't be tempted to take any photos. You might be ripping through thigh-deep powder, making beautiful tracks and catching some air in the terrain park but none of it can be captured on film. Nothing. A Facebook post, Tweet, or Instagram photo could cost you your job.
Step 6: Sunscreen- Yes, it's that important.
Step 7: Absolutely No Après-Ski Beers- See step 5. Après-ski parties are sure to give you the urge to post a sefie on Instagram. Just don't do it.
Step 8: Post a "Vaguebook" Post on Facebook- You know, "Ugh, I'd give anything to feel better." Or "Dear Flu, I hate you". Just post something so your co-worker Facebook friends won't suspect a thing. Ideally you've schedule this for some time right in the middle of the day.
Step 9: Consider Your Route Home Carefully- Chances are you might be coming home the same time as your co-workers. Take back roads and avoid driving by your place of work. At the very least, try to look a little sick. If you're spotted you can always say you were running to the drug store for medication. If you're rocking out to music or playing the In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida drum solo on your steering wheel you'll blow the whole day.
Step 10: Check Tomorrow's Forecast- More snow in the forecast? Proceed to step 2.